Why Christians Are So Judgemental

TL;DR – Because we use the same ruler to measure ourselves. Sometimes, we forgot how to spell compassion.

The five of us squeezed into my small SUV. His parents and sister came up for a visit, and we were on our way back from attending the church service.

Snugged at the back seat, I was enjoying this new perspective out the window when his dad spoke…

He: So, let me ask you something. When you get to the gate of heaven, God asked you why should I let you in. What do you say?

Momentarily stunned, I was speechless.

The air in the car suddenly became still. I heard his sister gasped.

Me: I believe Jesus Christ has died for my sins, and I accept him as my saviour.

He: Very good. *turned to face the windshield and settled back into the seat*

Photo by Robert Nyman on Unsplash


Actually, he had prepared me for this question.

Perhaps he knew his father’s tendency to interrogate.

I knew the feeling of shame would come upon me if I had not answered it correctly.


Running a small wedding photography business, I hired him as my assistant slash driver. Most of the time, I feel bad that he’s bored for hours.

On a Sunday afternoon, my clients asked me to meet at the venue a month prior to the wedding to go over the details. I hadn’t given much thoughts as it was usually the bride who does the contacting.

Me: Oh, hi! *surprised to see two women standing in the entrance*

She: Hello, this is my fiancée. It’s very nice to finally meet you. *smiling with much warmth*

Getting back to the car, I shut the passenger door.

Me: This is going to be a lesbian wedding. *still panting*

He: What!? Okay… you’d have to come alone then.

Photo by Chris Johnson on Unsplash


I did go alone.

And, I must admit that I was appalled seeing two women kissing for the first time.

Were they wrong, or was I wrong?


Driving towards the cottage in the north where they would be getting married, we lowered the window to take in the rare spring breeze.

She: He’s Orthodox and I’m Catholic, so we decided to get married at an Orthodox church. You will see, it’s beautiful inside.

Me: Really? Where is the church? *trying to listen through the sound of the wind*

She: Oh it’s a 30 min drive from our condo, so a bit far. Last week, we attended the premarital counselling there and it was hilarious. I don’t know. Maybe the Orthodox priests are more chill, but he was like “I know all of you are already having sex so let’s just admit it.”

Me: Haha, that’s… wow… *stunned*

Photo by ian dooley on Unsplash


I judged. Inwardly.

At the time, I had been staying away from premarital sex for 6 years.

I thought I had done it, why couldn’t you?

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