Don’t be so easily offended.
Waking up early on Sundays for church services may bring painful childhood memories for many believers. As a university student at the time, it was especially agonizing. Not to mention the obligation I felt having to attend with his entire family.
As soon as the pastor began speaking, my eyelids grew heavy. The cushioned chairs felt like clouds. Suddenly, I was jotted by sounds of giggles.
He: I saw you falling asleep. *half-joking, half-scolding*
Me: But you didn’t have to point it out to your parents… *wished I could dig myself a hole*
He: It’s ok. They don’t judge. It was just kind of funny. *shrugged*
That was more than five years ago, yet I could remember the shame as clear as if it had happened yesterday.
Thinking I was being too sensitive, I did not tell him to stop.
I mean, cool people are not offended by jokes, right?
Coming out of the bathroom, I pretended that I didn’t just take a little longer than usual to finish my business…
He: Oh great, I thought I’d go handwash my shirt. *getting up from the bed*
Me: Wait, no, umm. Don’t go in there yet… *awkward*
He: That’s ok! I don’t mind it at all. We all stink up the toilets everyday, and I bet yours probably isn’t that bad. *seemingly unbothered*
Me: What!? Is this how you were with your ex? *shocked*
He: Hmm, what do you mean? *confused*
Me: Just… well, I think I’ve been embarrassed about taking longer in the bathroom, farting, and those kinds of things with my ex, so I always try to hide them.
He: What? Why? *surprised*
Me: Because he’d announce loudly to everyone in the house. It doesn’t matter if my friends or his siblings were there.
Calling it humiliation is perhaps too strong of a word.
But what is a good balance between humorous teasing and overboard mockery?
Sometimes, neither of you realizes the accumulated bitterness, so you both continue to hurt.